It Cost Her Something

I believe when I was writing Two Things Can Be True, and maybe even It’s Gonna Cost You Something, I thought about the person I’m going to discuss. Cuz I definitely though about her today.

It’s good ol Elisha, a woman, and her son again. It’s in one of the Kings. 2 I believe. Happy hunting. Go verify my words.

She was married to a man who was a prophet affiliated with Elisha. She sent word that her husband was dead. She made sure she name checked. She called her husband Elisha’s servant.

She told him her husband’s creditors were coming and going to take her sons as slaves.

E was like what can I do to help? Watchu got in yo house girl?

Sis was like “I ain’t got nothing but a small pot of olive oil.” Ooooh I can’t wait to get where I’m going.

E was like “aight bet. Go to your neighbors and get all the vessels (pots) you can. Don’t skimp. Get a bunch of them thangs. Go inside and shut the door behind you and your sons. Pour oil into them and set them aside as they get full.

I’m gonna go somewhere else I wasn’t going. When he prayed over the boy I talked about in Two Things Can Be True, he went in and shut the door.

He gave her instructions that included going in and shutting the door.

When Jesus got to the house of Jairus where his daughter lay dead, he put the people out and shut the door.

When Jesus was teaching the disciples about doing stuff for or with God (go find it chiiii) He told them to do it in secret and their Father would reward them openly.

Sometimes we got to go through the process alone and quietly. This is a word for me!

David was made king in the pasture. Where he was before and after he was anointed as the next king. I am probably repeating myself but oh well.

Joseph was made second in command of Egypt after being sold, ending up in Potiphar’s house as he serving in that position, and then falsely accused and imprisoned.

We need to get behind that door and let God make us into who He showed us we would be. Move in silence. And when it’s time, let Him put us on display in a place nobody can take because nobody put us there but Him.

So, sis is filling pots left and right. Old school assembly line I’m imagining. She ends up asking her sons for another pot. They’re like “dis it moms. Dats alluem (all of them).”

Sis is like “aight. Aye yo E. I filled the pots like you said. Now what?”

E tells her to sell the oil and pay the creditors.

Bruh. I just got something else. Okay.

Before Jesus died, Mary broke open her alabaster box filled with what? Oil. She anointed Jesus for His burial.

Before He was arrested, Jesus sat in the Garden of Gethsemane sweating blood and asking not to have to go to the cross if it was possible. If you read another blog you know where He was: on Mt. Olivet/Mt. of Olives surrounded by what it takes to make oil. As Christ. Which means the Anointed One.

My blogging, author person reminded me that King David was anointed three times. Maybe one for the Father, one for the Son, and one for the Holy Spirit who are all one identified by the name of Jesus who is the King on the throne.

All this lady had was the symbol of anointing. That symbol multiplied and provided for her. This brings to mind the Scripture that says but my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory BY CHRIST Jesus.

Sometimes, all we have is the anointing and the Anointed One. Those are the best times. Cuz He shows us who He is. And we have enough because He is all, and everything, that we need.

Do what it takes to be anointed. It ain’t easy bein breezy. But it’s worth it.

Go be great. Someone is counting on you.

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Insecurities & Disqualifications

I think it is so interesting how God uses things and people that are insecurities or lack of qualifications.

My pastor taught us about Colossians and Paul during Bible class. He gave us some of Paul’s history.

The way Paul opened some of his letters seemingly points to his insecurity about how he came to be an Apostle. And it seems like it is more because of the other Apostles’ reactions and not anything he felt on his own.

Let’s be real though. Can you blame them for feeling some type of way? I give them initial feelings. But, if they kept it up, that’s not okay. Who knows though.

Cuz don’t we stay in our feelings sometimes long after whoever did it has moved on?

Paul was seemingly the most unqualified due to his persecution of the Christians. But God turned it. He is, after all, the author of Romans 8:28.

Ima run a list of the people I can think of who messed up or had things they thought stood in their way or who people counted out or who never should have been as impactful as they were.

Noah: it had never rained yet he said it would. They laughed. Then they drowned. Buddy got drunk and it wasn’t nothing good.

Abraham: worshiped pagan gods but followed God. Lied about Sarah being his wife and sister (just said sister) twice. Had a baby that wasn’t the promised child.

Jacob/Israel: tricked his brother out of his birthright then let the women and children in his life come in contact with the brother who had wanted to murder him before him (I mean if Esau was ready to fight they would have been killed first and Jacob could have run).

10 of Israel’s sons: sold Israel’s favorite son Joseph into slavery and lied to him about Joseph’s death.

Moses: murdered an Egyptian after being a Hebrew living with the king who enslaved the Hebrews. Had a speech impediment.

Samson: in relationship with a woman who wasn’t his wife who He told about where his strength was so he ended up weak, bald, and blind.

Rahab: a harlot (sex worker).

Esther: a young Jewish girl who was a part of the group one of the non-Jewish king’s right hand man wanted to destroy.

David: an overlooked boy sent to the field who his family couldn’t bother to call in at first when the prophet came to anoint the new king. Slept with a woman and had her husband killed because he got her pregnant when he should have been at war and her husband wouldn’t sleep with her to cover up the pregnancy because they were at war.

Samuel: his mother couldn’t even get pregnant for the longest so his existence was an answered prayer against long odds.

Isaac & Joseph: I couldn’t think of anything for them at first but I guess the same goes for them and their conceptions. And Joseph wasn’t disqualified but his brothers did what they did which surely should have resulted in the inability of his dreams to come true.

Ruth: widowed by a foreigner in her home land who then travels to the foreign land of her deceased husband with his widowed mother.

Jeremiah: young and inexperienced.

Nehemiah: in captivity but wanting to restore the city of God.

Mary: a teenage virgin engaged to be married when she was overshadowed by the Holy Spirit and impregnated with Jesus.

John the Baptist: his parents were unable to conceive and he ended up being out in the wilderness talking about some man coming after him

Jesus: a lil carpenter’s son who wasn’t formally trained in the Synagogue saying and doing things that were not the custom or in line with what they saw their Scriptures at the time to say.

Peter: lied and denied his relationship with Christ

Me: a fast talking reader who is rebellious to some in my interpretation of the Bible

Every one of these people, including me, was chosen by God and helped make an impact for His kingdom.

DO NOT despise your journey.

DO NOT despise your past.

A testimony is a story about the tests you were able to eventually pass. It is a testament to the power of Jesus and what He was able to mold as the Potter with the clay of your life.

Oooooooh this is about to be so good to me.

After all. All we are is dirt.

To make pottery, clay is used. Clay is comprised of a substance similar to dirt. Water is added to turn it into clay.

Jesus is the living water that turns our dirt into clay. He puts us on a wheel and shapes us. We make mistakes and He has to add more water or reform the piece.

Just like humans who make pottery. It isn’t discarded. It is reused until it has taken the proper form.

Then we get put in the fire. Set. Then we get painted and decorated. I believe put in the fire again. Set.

Get up from where you are.

David was told that the first baby would die. He went and fasted and prayed hoping God would turn it around.

God didn’t. When he found out the baby was dead, he got up, cleaned up, and went and ate. He accepted the consequences of his actions. He didn’t wallow in his failure. He knew the God he served.

My pastor also talked about this. He ended up marrying Bathsheeba and having another child. Solomon. Who would become king and build the temple-what we all go to when we go to church.

He can use it all. No thing or time wasted. No mistake is too big that you can’t come back from it.

That is part of the point of His death on the cross. To extend grace and mercy and provide everything we need to live a life pleasing to Him. To overcome sin and be a reflection of Him.

Give it to Him and let Him change your story for His glory.

Go be great. Someone is counting on it.

(I wrote a follow up. What Do You See.)

Lettuce Pray

Ha. These titles sometimes.

My un-title-able person (who blogs here who I am so excited to nag about her forthcoming book that will bless the people) asked me to pray with her about something.

Okay bet. I send prayers through text and have for years at this point. She was all into it.

I said thanks but I was unimpressed by how much she liked it if I’m honest. I think I take for granted the things I’ve done on my own in my wilderness.

To the point that someone said I’m more powerful than I think. After I used it on her, my person agreed.

I told her the steps that I adhere to and she told me to blog it. I told her I was gonna make it a book. I went and prayed about it and here we are.

There are levels to, different reasons for, and different kinds of prayer. I said, in Salvation I believe, that the base level of prayer is just a conversation with the Father.

A lot of times I LEGITIMATELY just talk to Him like I talk to y’all. I roll my eyes and suck my teeth. Facts. I’m super honest.

One. Cast cares because He cares.

Two. In different moments He is different things. He’s a Father and a big deal. But He also called us friends.

Through the death of Jesus as son and adoption as a Gentile, He’s my big brother.

But. When it is time to bring heaven down to earth, there are certain things I always do. Over the course of many a church service, conference, etc., I was taught these things.

I call Him Father often times.

Then I thank Him for who He is. Worship. Acknowledging His holiness and the parts of Him that are necessary for the request (Jehova Jireh, magnificent, I exalt You (that one is weird based off of the description. He is the King on the throne. By exalting Him, I acknowledge that He is above me and above everything.)).

Then I tell Him what His Word says while asking for the request. The best way, in my humble opinion, to reach heaven is to let heaven know what its Creator says. After all, He said His Word wouldn’t return to Him void but would accomplish what He sent it to.

I thank Him some more for hearing the request and also (often) by faith for fulfilling the request.

And then the MOST important part. I say in the name of Jesus. Sometimes I worship there too by describing what the name of Jesus is (mighty, matchless, all powerful, saving). And then hit Him with an Amen.

I am putting an edited version of my prayer for her below so you can actually see what I mean.

Father, thank You that You are Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides. You are the same God who provided for Abraham. Your promises are yes and amen. You said if we abide in You Your Word abide in us and we can ask what we will. Your Word says if we delight in the Lord You will give us the desires of our heart. Kind and gracious Father, we simply ask You to honor Your Word. Because it says it will not return void but must accomplish that which You sent it to. She has been a faithful servant and served and led well. God we thank You that you hear us but more importantly You hear Your Word. In the mighty and matchless name of Jesus, amen!

Go be great. Someone is counting on it!

Cheap Isn’t Always Better

I am going THROUGH it right now.

The Scripture that just came to mind is this: We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 KJV.

This perfectly describes my situation. Just about everything that can go wrong has been going wrong.

But, I am focused on my anchor. When I try to lose it, okay when I did at the beginning of this current transition and some moments since, I bring myself back around to who God is. See Tricky Trust & Fickle Faith.

One of my issues right now is my car. It is stationary. That affects my ability to work my gig job. Which is affecting my ability to pay my car payment. Which will affect my ability to work my job and have a car.

I really wanna freak out and stress out. I have some plans in the works to get funds to get the money to pay. But they are taking forever.

I also asked around for a mechanic. I was trying to do it as cheap as possible. The mechanic has been unresponsive. And he may have given bad advice.

After he didn’t answer the call after the text from the other day, I called around. The prices are far higher than the mechanic or what I wanted to pay.

He will likely do it right. He works in an actual shop. But he is MIA. And I gotta get this together. I had plans for what I wanted to fix and which funds. But, one set of funds is delayed another week. Now, I have to adjust how I’m going to do all that I need to do.

The deadline for the car payment is far closer for comfort than I’d like without actual funds in hand. Especially with a holiday Monday.

But, here’s the thing. In Bible class last night they talked about when Samuel was off doing the things of God and Saul became impatient. Saul offered the burnt offering Samuel should have. Because of this, Samuel told Saul another king would come into power. (1 Samuel 13)

Doing the cheap or convenient or easy thing may cost far more in the long run. I’m going to invest in my car so I can keep it at least another six years or until I want to get a new car.

I’m going to invest in trust and faith in God so when something that requires more faith comes I can handle something bigger. Faith to faith and alla that (Romans 1:17). I’m gonna keep rehearsing the fact that I’ve been here before. And I’ve not been forsaken or begging bread (Psalm 37:25).

When He does it He will get the glory. That’s the point of it all anyway. So that He gets the glory out of my life. You got it Boss!

*The saga continues Waiting Is The Action But Patiently Is The Attitude*

Tricky Trust & Fickle Faith

There’s this guy I was talking to. He couldn’t remember stuff I told him to save his life. I asked him if he had amnesia or a memory problem.

I saw someone post online about the weight of the wait. They said they’re remembering what they’ve seen God do. Because they owe Him everything.

I’m currently waiting on God to do some stuff. I have been panicked at moments. I have questioned myself and worried about what’s going to happen.

It’s as if I have amnesia. I’ve trusted Him before in similar circumstances. I’ve had faith and it’s worked out because of the work I put into my faith.

But sometimes, for some reason, it’s hard to trust and have faith. Somehow we forget who He’s been. We forget what He’s done. The weight of the wait clouds our memory.

I am going to continue to do what I’ve had to do in these moments this week. Put his track record on display for myself. Contemplate who He has been. Consider what He has done. Compare then and now. Craft resolve.

Most importantly, go to the source material. Scripture is invaluable in these moments. And if I tell Him what He said, He is, by His own admission, duty bound to honor His Word.

I got this SOLELY BECAUSE He’s got this. And THAT is enough for me. 😊

*See Waiting Is The Action But Patiently Is The Attitude*

I Quit Church

How odd for a Christian to not go to church. I honestly never thought I would be anything less than a faithful church attendee.

But the reality is this: after 26 years of mostly faithful attendance, the past 5ish years has been spotty and mostly nonexistent.

To many that’s baffling. Especially some of the people I’m closest too. I was hardcore active and present every time the doors opened. For a multitude of reasons, I even chose to go to church instead of seeing my cousin when she came in town. 🙈

I’m not a perfect Christian or person. I’m human. But you learn a few things, see a few things, by being a halfway decent Christian according to mainstream standards for 26ish years.

There are a couple of the many churches I have attended that are my favorite. It’s hard for others to measure up. Not to mention my distillation of the Bible I read and believe has led me to a complex conclusion with strong held convictions.

For comparison’s sake-when it comes to church I’m kinda a snob. Like Starbucks diehards. Or many iPhone owners.

When you’ve experienced the best why settle? Especially when it is something as important as a relationship with Jesus and salvation.

I won’t get into all of my beliefs and the inherent contradictions. I am well aware that all of this many not be kosher when considering what scripture has to say.

But I read my Bible. I could do better at that. I talk to Jesus. I could do better at that too.

We are all striving and can all do better. Where I am right now is good enough for me. That sounds slightly horrible as I tap it out.

I just don’t want to go to church for the sake of going to church. That’s religion. I’d rather have a relationship any day.

People don’t trust their kids with just anybody. Why should I do that with my church attendance?

Maybe I’ll find somewhere. Maybe I’ll find something. Maybe I should be more proactive. But maybe, just maybe, I’m fine just where I am right now.