Tag Archives: poncho

How To (Actually) Help

I saw a woman who looked like she had been out in the rain for a while as I exited the gas station.

I knew I had a poncho in my car that I thought may potentially help her not get any wetter than she already was.

I found her inside and asked if she would like the poncho.

She looked at me like I was crazy and said no.

I may have said okay. We both exited the store.

Now. I could have made a deal of sorts and told her why I thought she should take it.

I was trying to be helpful.

She didn’t ask for help. Her decision to say no indicated that she didn’t want it.

Often we force what we think is best on people and call it help. But. They didn’t ask for it. And, for whatever reason, they don’t want it.

We gotta let that be okay. We gotta respect that people are different and what we see one way they see another.

If it isn’t beneficial in the eye of the recipient, it is likely not actually helpful at all. And to push it or force it or make them feel bad if they don’t want it, turns “help” into control.

Let’s be mindful. Even when our initial intentions are good. 🙃😊😍