Tag Archives: mind

Still There

I was cleaning the other day and there was rice everywhere in the pantry. I pushed it off of what it was on onto the floor. Some of it had already spilled and I needed to clean the floor anyway.

When I was done cleaning and it was time to clean the floor I couldn’t see the rice but I knew it was there.

I swept the floor and, as I knew, I gathered rice.

The point of my being in the pantry is because there was disorganized chaos.

We have a whole lot of stuff we can’t see because our lives and minds aren’t organized. Here I go with this again.

We haven’t taken stock and inventory of what is going on with us. We have trauma and pain, hurt and confusion, disappointment and abandonment hidden among so many other things.

That was the initial route I was going with this. But, while writing, the age old adage that is ever true came to mind. Even when we can’t see Him, what we know to be true, is that God is always there.

We have all of this mess and stuff that we need clean. We name it and put it out there. Or stuff we need. We know we place our petitions before Him.

But He isn’t moving quickly enough. Or at all. Or we just don’t see Him in the process.

Then all of a sudden here comes something “big” (big cuz it may be small but the smallest things can be big in the moment), like a broom to a pile of dirt, comes along and shows us God was there all along. Just like we knew. Just like He said He would be.

I didn’t publish this the other day and stopped writing because I was tired and felt like this didn’t make much sense. It still may not. I think the organization may be off. I dunno. But, this is just a thoughts post. Perfection is never my aim. I think all of it is important. Hopefully it makes enough sense.

The point is two fold. Just because we can’t see our issues and mess does not mean that they are not there. We need to clean it up so God can use us. We don’t use partially clean stuff in our lives why would God want to use a partially clean life for His glory? Especially when NOTHING about Him is unclean. And when nothing, no thing is hidden. He already knows. Just tell Him and let Him help and guide us into cleaning it up. Things will always be a bit off until we do anyway.

Second, though we may not be able to see Him, or trace Him as some say, the Word gives us a promise. He will never leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5 KJV). He keeps His promises. It may seem like all is lost and He has abandoned or forgotten you.

Look at Job. He was there. He allowed Job to go through it because He knew Job and knew he could handle it. That’s the not allowing us to be tempted more than we can bear in 1 Corinthians 10:13.

I’m sure Job had more feelings than we see-despite seeing a lot of them. But God knew that he could handle the loss and the temptation to walk away from Him. He questioned God. He expressed his feelings. God could handle the messiness of it.

Then God reminded Job who He was. Job gathered himself and got it together. Then God blessed him with even more than before. God knew what He was doing, who He was gonna get His glory from.

Valleys don’t exist without mountains. Mountains don’t exist without valleys. But God is the Creator and God of them ALL.

Clean or Nah

First off. These are huge. Second. There are pictures of dirt and trash. Look away if you want. It will make sense in the end.

I was at someone’s home who has a dog. But the dog gets sick if it eats random crap. In order to let the dog be free and not get fussed at for eating stuff, I decided to vacuum the floor where the dog is allowed to roam.

As I vacuumed, it seemed like it wasn’t picking up what I was vacuuming. As you can see below, the tank looked empty. I was confused. So, I took it off and looked inside. All of that clumped stuff in the middle was in the hole on the vacuum and in the part that connects one of the hoses.

Since I cleaned the vacuum, I decided to just sweep up what was left after picking up the clumps. No need in dirtying up what I had JUST cleaned with the same dirt.

I put the vacuum back together and swept the carpet. I took the vacuum apart again and this is what I saw.

Now at first, I thought maybe I had missed all of that in the tank. But when I looked at the pictures again, I didn’t think that was the case. I think that is a bunch of dog hair.

That is what the filter looked like. I had a bag less vacuum and when it got dirty I washed off the filter. I decided to do that this time too.

I think I failed to upload a pic. Ion care. I’m not going to. Just know, it looked better when I applied water before applying any soap. This pic is after water and soap.

I told the person I washed it and they questioned me since it was going to get dirty again. They said they never thought to clean it. I let them know that I had before and at least it would be clean.

I have had several thoughts and lessons flit, come through my mind while typing this and intially forever ago when I created the post.

First of all. We may look clean but there is a whole lot of mess and stuff in us. If we don’t clean it out we will not work properly. Huh. Sounds similar to what I just wrote in Still There. This was a draft before that. I guess I had the same thought again though since it got published first.

Second. If there is more than one way to do something, and you have made progress with one way, why not try it another way? Aaaaaand. If you have cleaned up one area, don’t just mess it up again because it is easy to do what you have done.

I could have just vacuumed up the leftover dirt from pulling the packed dirt out. But why? A broom and dust pan is just as effective. I didn’t just do what was easy or what I had done and plug it back in and vacuum it back up.

Third. If we do use the same methods, go the same way, we may just have to clean again. But in a different way. Some different issue or consequence will arise. We don’t necessarily reap the way we sow or reap the same way we have reaped before (Galatians 6:7-8). I used the same vacuum on a different surface in a different area. I thought I missed the dirt. But, upon further inspection, it was different dirt in a different area of the vacuum.

Fourth and finally, just because all looked well and clean, that was NOT the case. In the pic of the trash can, it appears that the filter may just be dirty from the way I dumped the tank. However, upon further inspection when I flipped it, it was FILTHY. It was hidden.

What are we hiding? What have we cleaned some, cleaned one way, given to God some, given to Him one way but left dirty, held on to? He knows it ALL. Just give it ALL to Him. He wants it. He can handle it. Let Him be God! Let Him give us what He has promised us!

Galatians 6:9 (KJV) promises us good news: let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

I did not give up. I kept looking and made sure I found all of the dirt. I didn’t wash or wipe the whole thing. Just the filter. But my diligence, persistence, the fact that I kept going, ensured that the vacuum was cleaner and capable of functioning properly. Unlike the condition I found it.

Fooling with the vacuum wasn’t that hard. Examining myself sometimes is. I don’t always wanna act right. I don’t always wanna say the right thing. I just wanna be in my lil fleshly feelings. I mess up.

However, I am doing the hard work of trying to emulate, be like my friend, my brother, my lord, my savior, my Jesus. It has not been easy. It has hurt. It has been confusing. Like why that thang was dirty but I saw nothing.

But guess what? I see change. I see growth. I am obtaining the fruit of the spirit. I am hearing from God and getting alla this revelation in ways I wasn’t before.

I am cleaning my life, my relationships, my emotions, my mind, what I consume (entertainment, food, and conversation). I am making room and space for my relationship with Jesus.

Like I said the other day, it looks a mess on the outside. But, to me, this is the best life I have lived thus far. I’m content in the state I find myself in (Philippians 4:11).

Do We Really Believe?

I’m listening to somebody sing an awesome song. I’ve conversed with them and they dont seem to trust the God they are singing about.

Jesus commissioned the disciples to do what he was doing. They watched him,earned from him, and then he said go to the people do what you’ve seen me do. (Mark 9:1-6)

A couple of them came back unable to cast a demon out. Jesus did it. The disciples asked why they couldn’t. Jesus said it was because of their unbelief. (Matthew 17:14-20)

It’s a puzzling, interesting thing that we go to church and hear sermons, hear songs, read the Bible, do all of this God-centric or God-adjacent stuff yet…

We don’t see the promises of God manifested. We look at the problem and not the problem solver.

We look at the wind and the waves and sink instead of focusing on the Savior in the middle of a miracle. (Matthew 14:25-30)

We create this hero who we don’t allow to become our friend. We create this Santa Claus but don’t fellowship with him. We create this genie but don’t allow him to lead and guide us.

We ask, but not according to his will. (1 John 5:14) So, we end up with issues. We don’t do what the Bible says do in, the way it says to do it in order to receive because we aren’t fully believing it. Why? Because our concept of who he is and how we should relate to him is skewed.

We aren’t taught or ignore the character and mind of who God truly is. If we don’t know how can we believe? Our relationship is a two way street

But, if we are conditioned to always ask, have our hand out, expect him to just do whatever we ask, we are disappointed. That affects our belief.

What a world this would be if we allowed the Word and the giver of that word to come alive in our lives. What a world this would be if we invited him in and gave him control. What a world it would be if we simply, truly believed.