Tag Archives: expect

You Dead or Nah????

Faith y’all. Faith.

Faith without works is dead. James 2:17. The whole chapter is worth reading.

My brain is finna feel dead. I have four posts to edit in addition to the four? I’ve finished and Proverbs 21. Sheesh. It’s my fault though. Poor planning and time management. Digression.

We pray and we ask God for help. We expect Him to do all the work. Now, some of this may be my good, Instagram girlfriend in my head @shanickavailhouse/@mytransparentMOMents.

But, works require us to do something. God gives us insight and wisdom on how to obtain some things that we pray for. Either we miss it or are stubborn, obstinate, don’t want to do it His way.

If we do nothing the faith we had to ask for it or believe it would happen dies. Why? Because we do not obtain what we believed through our failure to act.

There are some things and miracles God just does and gives. I’m not talking about that.

I want to lose weight. I want to drink more water. I asked God for help. This isn’t the first time. I have tried.

I didn’t love exercising. I didn’t love water. Usually didn’t drink much of anything unless it came with the meal and could eat without any beverage. Didn’t love the outdoors. Ion like weather extremes after living in the cold midwest and hot south and not being out in it much as a child.

Something happened in the middle of the pandemic. Y’all, for my Apostolic/Pentecostal/Holiness/well informed folk, I just quickened.

In the middle of death. In the middle of devastation. In the middle of uncertainty. In the middle of chaos. In the middle of confusion. In the middle of confinement. In the middle of quarantine. In the middle of loss. While I was essential personnel. While I worked every scheduled shift unless I requested off. I lost weight while others gained it.

I would love to say I worked hard. But I didn’t really work at all. I just stopped eating more than one maybe two meals. It was really laziness. I was staying up after I got off at midnight and sleeping or not wanting to go get food. I wasn’t cooking. I feel like I may have said some of this elsewhere. Forgive me. It’s worth repeating.

Once I saw what I had done while accidentally, inadvertently intermittently fasting, I was sold. I bought a half-gallon igloo and decided to drink my water. I started craving it.

I started walking in the park and loved it. I get irritable, definitely today, when I can’t go outside and walk due to the weather. I have been out in walking in the teens or low twenties at the coldest. I just bundle up. I have come to love, love, love God’s nature.

I don’t just eat vegetables and healthily. As a matter of fact, I lost weight eating junk and fast food. I stopped most of the bad stuff at first. I don’t eat nearly as much junk as before. My water intake has slowed. As has the exercise. Moving and having a different lifestyle is an interesting adjustment. But somehow, I am still losing.

I have worked my faith and God has been gracious to me.

Whatever you are believing God for, figure out what your part is. And walk it out. Work it. He just may be waiting on you.

20. 20.

I am grateful to see the end of the year mostly unscathed.

I lost a family member to the rona.

Four family members definitely recovered. One likely recovered.

A childhood friend’s mom was lost to the rona.

An asthmatic family member lost their life due to a chemical reaction.

I lost an uncle due to a variety of health issues.

An uncle was rushed to the hospital, and though serious, it wasn’t as bad as was thought.

Two coworkers and a boss tested positive for the rona and have recovered.

I am no longer on speaking terms with my father. 21 years of foolishness resulted in my departure-at his prodding-for my peace of mind.

Endured the craziest three point five weeks with a male I have ever experienced in the middle of a pandemic.

Left some friends-acquaintances-alone.

Left some family members alone.

Reconnected with some friends I let go.

Made a new friend.

Made some new connections.

Followed purpose with expectation of fulfilled vision-from years ago. Not a catchy 2020 gimmick.

Realized some things that I needed to work on and change.

Saw some growth.

Chose myself.

2020 was wild.

But the BEST thing? Focusing on the best friend I’ll ever have, my big brother, my Lord, my Savior.

I’ve been coasting and on autopilot. When Jesus and I are cool, winds and waves don’t play.

I ended this year forced to look to him.

Best decision.

It’s been wild.

But it’s been worth it.

Here’s to 2021.

A multiple of seven.

Biblical meaning of completion.

I expect Jesus to complete some things.

I expect craziness. It wouldn’t be my life without some tests and trials.

I know who’s got me.

I don’t expect easy.

But I expect peace. I expect joy. I expect good things-no matter how it looks or feels.

Cuz I rock with the one who can speak to whatever I face.

I am never alone or forsaken.

That alone makes it well with my soul.